Mom of the Year Award

OHMommy over at Classy Chaos thinks that she's in the running for the Worst Mom of the Year award. Seriously, you should go read this post. A recap: she sent her daughter to preschool in a cheerleading costume. One that her daughter is obsessed with. What parent hasn't done that?

(Seriously, Sam has this pair of baseball pants that a friend gave him that he wears every. freaking. day. and I hate them with a passion that burns hotter than a thousand suns. However, I let him wear them because ... well, it's easier than trying to reason with the child. Or burning the pants. But I digress ...)

But OHMommy forgot that it was school picture day. And that there may or may not have been some oatmeal on said cheerleading costume. She's fairly mortified, and acting like the world is ending. :)

(I say this with love, because she makes me laugh all the time when I check out her blog. You should spend some time perusing her archives.)

But dearest Pauline, wonderful OHMommy, I have news for you. You might be classy, you might be a tad obsessed with stilettos in a slightly unhealthy way, you might speak several languages ... but you, my dear, are an amateur. You have no idea.

But I do. Because at book club last night, we got to talking. My sweet friend Melanie, who introduced me to the book club five years ago, is someone I met at a Bible study I did when Sam and Evie were little. Melanie was in my small group one year, then was the teacher for one of the children's classes ... the class with Sam and Evie.

Our story takes place about the time that Evie was learning how to dress herself, and she was very proud of it. Didn't matter that she would put on a pink shirt with some sequins and some green pants and maybe a blue sock and an orange sock. With ugly brown shoes. Heaven help the person who tried to coordinate her once her mind was set.

(I don't know why she owned green pants. Looking back, I find that to be ... well ... wrong. No one should own green pants, and I have no excuse for letting them enter my house. I apologize.)

So we were running late one morning (yes, shocking, I know!!) and finally everyone was dressed and out the door and in their car seats and buckled and snapped and strapped and we were driving across town to Bible study. I ended up only being abut five minutes late to small group after dropping off the kids and running across the church grounds.

I think that was the year we were studying Esther, but I don't remember. I'm sure everything went well, and that I enjoyed the lesson that day (as I generally did; it was a great Bible study), and learned stuff. Chatted a bit with my aunt and some friends, and went back to the kids building to pick up Sam and Evie and head home. When I got over there, Melanie rushed me at the door and dragged my ass over to a corner very discretely pulled my aside.

"What's up, Mel?" I inquired in my usual, carefree tone of voice.

"Brea, your daughter isnnkelwlem mme mumble kjwlr wenbjwrhw."

"Huh?"

"It's Evie. She mmwejkwr mumble wejlrwe."

"Melanie, speak up. You're freaking me out! What did Evie do?"

"Brea, she didn't do anything. She isn't wearing any underwear!"

(silence)

(crickets begin to chirp)

"Huh?"

(At this point, I should probably mention Evie's outfit for the day. Was she wearing pants? No. A long skirt? Notsomuch. Shorts, even? Of course not. Evie was wearing a cute flared short denim skirt with a pink bow on it, a green shirt, and red sandals. The outfit is forever seared into my memory, believe me.)

"Yeah, Brea. She went over to play with the dollhouse, picked up a doll, and I could see all the way to China if you know what I mean."

"Oh. Um. Hmmmm. Well, shit."

"Yeah."

And then it dawned on me ... "OH MY GOODNESS! I brought my daughter to Bible study in a short skirt with no flipping underwear?!?!"

"Yeah, Brea."

"Melanie, I've never done this before, I swear. Thank you so much for not turning me in! Wait, you didn't turn me in, did you?"

She hadn't turned me in. And now, it's really, really, really funny. Everyone (especially the gals without kids) got a really big kick out of the story last night.

So there's a few lessons you can learn from all this:

1. As Pauline has taught us, pay attention to school picture day. It's probably best to mark it on a very visible calendar. In red ink.

2. The things that mortify us at the time, make us pray for the earth to open and swallow us whole ... in the long run, it's ok. More than ok, it's usually pretty damn funny.

And last, but certainly not least ...

3. Always do an underwear check before walking out the door. Especially if you're headed to Bible study.

For real.

My Morning

Yes, moi, the ultimate wake-up-early, watch-the-sunrise, enjoy-the-silence-of-the-morning kind of gal ... It's true. It's 11:45 and I'm only on my second cup of coffee, because I've only been up for about an hour.

Why, Brea?

Oh, I'm glad you asked. Because, with five weeks left until my due date, the psychotic nesting instinct has started to randomly strike. I say random because right now, were someone to pour a bucket of sand on the floor of every room in my house, I would probably look at said piles of sand and walk away.

Last night? At 11? Noooooooo ... I was up until 1:30 cleaning my effin' bathroom. With a freakin' toothbrush. Also, my washing machine. What kind of crazy person takes a scrubber and said toothbrush and details their washing machine?

Oh, right. Yeah. That would be me.

Then I had to take a bath. Cause, you know, why not? Also, my back was hurting.

And my sweet husband, who didn't even get home until 2:30, ran crowd control on the kids this morning until I rolled myself out of bed. God bless that wonderful man.

And now, as I sip my third cup of coffee, I'm being serenaded my the clacking of my keys on the keyboard, Rush playing on iTunes, and ... the sounds of a rifle being fired repeatedly in my backyard. Cause, you know, why not? We live in Bastrop, people. You know all those stereotypical redneck stories you hear about people in the country? I'm pretty sure that most, if not all, of the stories originated in Bastrop County. So when Saturday morning rolls around, it's what you do: wake up, have some coffee and breakfast, chat with your spouse over the newspaper, tell the kids to brush their teeth, then head out back for a little bonding and target practice.

I just decided to stay in this morning because I didn't want to damage everyone's self-esteem too much. I'm a good shot, mmmk? Though Sam is quickly catching up ... I don't like that. What a punk. :)

And on that note, it's now noon, and I have to get my lazy butt in the shower, then to the grocery store and back before John starts getting ready for work. Have a great weekend, everyone! Who has some big plans for the next few days?

growing up

No, not me. I'm not growing up; I've refused so far, why start now?

A friend and I went out for lunch and coffee last week, which was cool, until we got to 'Bux ... and she said, "Oh, I don't like coffee."

(Insert Brea giving Elli a really sarcastic and unbelieving look here.)

Who doesn't like coffee?? So I asked her, like any kind and sensitive friend would, "What in heaven's name is wrong with you? Who doesn't like coffee?" Luckily, I have a very nice friend, and she laughed and said, "Well, neither of my parents drink it, so I was never around it until college, and by then, I just didn't want any."

Well, ok. I get that. So we started talking about how each family seems to leave out a few traditional things, and the kids grow up all deprived and neglected.

(Not really about the deprived and neglected part. But go with me, mmmk?)

For those of you who live in places that aren't the South or Texas, there are certain things you do. You drink sweet tea year-round, for the better part of every day. You grow tomatoes. You say "yes, ma'am" and "no, sir" so that your momma doesn't tan your hide when you get home, and "please" and "thank you" are kind of ingrained and will never, ever leave your vocabulary, even if you try to not be polite. (I'm so not kidding. I thank people all the time for the most inane things! I can't help it!) You eat bar-b-que with alarming frequency.

And there are a few foods that ... well ... Robert E Lee help you if you don't serve them at a holiday. Ham. Rolls. Turkey. Gravy, preferably two different kinds. Green bean casserole. Yams with marshmallows on top. I mention these last two things because ...

(takes a deep breath to prepare for confession time)

... my family doesn't eat these foods.

(ducks from rotten food being thrown)

I know!! It's awful!! But as far as green beans went, we had so many fresh green beans from the garden that I think we didn't feel the need to torture ourselves with the things from a can. What is with the weird ring of those crunchy faux-onion thingys on the top? And, I mean, what did a green bean ever do to me that I'd want to put it in an oven?? Honestly! And the thing with the canned yams and the marshmallows ... to this day, it freaks me out. I'm not kidding. We grew up eating sweet potatoes at every holiday (still do!), but it was my great-grandmother's sweet potato souffle recipe that we had. (It's better. Trust me. By a million and 38 times.)

Also, I didn't realize until I was in my late teens, maybe ever older than 20, that when the rest of the world eats ribs, they eat pork ribs. Pork ribs!

The horror!!

I'm a Lone Star kind of gal, and as far as I'm concerned (and of course, I'm right) ribs go from the cow to the smoker to my plate. COW. Beef ribs, people. It's the only way to live trust me. Especially if my dad is making that kinda sweet sauce stuff that he brushes over them while they're on the grill ... Man, I still remember sneaking lots of little tastes of that stuff while he was cooking.

(In retrospect, it's kind of amazing that my brothers and I didn't all die of food poisoning when we were younger. However, that's a whole 'nother topic for another day ... and I'm digressing.)

All that to say, I guess I can't fault Elli too much for ordering hot chocolate instead of coffee. She wasn't raised to know better. (Zing! That's right, I said it!) We all have things our families leave out. I don't like potato salad, although it shows up a every. Southern. gathering. ever., and I also don't drink sweet tea. Can't help it!

At least I'm not as bad as my freakishly tall younger brothers. They were both raised right, in a God fearing, Gospel singing, coffee drinking household, and they still don't drink coffee. Can you believe the nerve of those two?!?!

Anyway, what always shows up on your family's holiday table? Is there anything obviously missing?

V-A-L-E-N-T-I-N-E

Ok, here's a few things I love. In alphabetical order, cause ... well, why not, right??

A good Texas southern drawl. Nothing sexier than being called "ma'am" while having a door opened for you by a Good Ole' Boy. Seriously.

Babies!!! And book club.

Chickens. And cowboy boots. I wear my boots four or five times each week, minimum. Even during Texas summers. And cooking. Chili. Oh, and coffee. Hmm, C is a good letter for me.

Dirt. It makes things grow. It smells unique. My kids like to play in it. 'Nough said.

Earthworms. See above. And Ertha Kitt.

Facebook. For real. And the Farmers' Market. And Field of Dreams.

Greek mythology.

Having such wonderful friends. Especially ones who live in Iowa, and say, "Sure, we've never met in person, but you can bring your punk ass kids and come visit me this summer!" (She doesn't know it, but I plan on throwing out a LOT of Field of Dreams references while I'm there.)

Information. I love to learn about anything and everything.

Jedi mind tricks. And homemade dewberry jam. And jasmine flowers: so small, but so fragrant!

Koala bears. I want to hug me some koala bear.

Long walks on the beach. *

My Amazon Kindle. It goes against almost everything I believe ... and I'm horribly, hopelessly in love with it!

Novels. And Nancy, my completely wonderful grandmother. (Note to self: interview her for the blog; she's super funny!) And the word nuptial.

Onions, but only when finely chopped and cooked. Especially in chili.

Procreation, the act of.

Queen. The band. Much like my BFF Sarah, my favorite song in the Whole World is Bohemian Rhapsody. That ballad is unparalleled in it's amazingness, right, Sarah?

Rough earth snakes. They look (and mostly act) like giant earthworms. We find them out here a lot, and Evie calls them 'the most friendly snake of all.' Of course, she's right.

Sarah. I know that is surprising ... if you've never met me. Or talked to me. Or looked at my blog.

Teasing John, and having him tease me back. It's quite fun, especially when I can one-up him ... which happens about ever second never. And Texas, cause it's the best. And tacos (the real kind, not from Taco Hell.)

Ufology. (That's the study of UFOs. I'm not kidding. I didn't make that up, I promise!)

Vampires. Edward Cullen, Sookie Stackhouse, Black Dagger boys, Ann Rice ... I can't help it! Sorry!! (Please don't tell anyone, cause I'd be really embarrassed to admit that I don't read Real Literature 100% of the time. In my defense, Atlas Shrugged is still the best book I've read in many, many years.)

WD40. Cause squeaky doors are the bane of my existence. Well, squeaky doors and laundry. But the WD40 doesn't help much with laundry. And working on my truck, but only when it doesn't cost too much money.

Xanadu. Have you seen that movie? It's awful; the ultimate guilty pleasure!

Yesterday. One of my fav Beatles' songs.

Zombie movies, even though they scare the ever-living (or is it ever-undead??) snot out of me.

So now you know.

*Total lie. I hate the ocean with a passion. But it sounds nice, don't you think?

It's the New Year!

And I've got nothing new to say. :) But I figured I'd better get on with this posting thing before Sarah comes after me and pummels me with a keyboard or something.

Baby news: I've officially hit my third trimester. I feel ridiculously pregnant, and it happened really, really fast. Like always. I have a check up with Laurie this afternoon. I love Laurie. Midwives rule. I'd like to be able to take Texas' midwifery exam by next summer. We'll see how that works out ... I think the baby is going to be here early. I have absolutely no valid reason to feel like this. I just know it.

Come to think of it, I also knew, without a doubt (or any valid reason) that David was going to be a girl. So ... following that logic, the baby should be here about three weeks late.

My older two kids both got a Nintendo DS for Christmas. Samuel's is blue; Evelyn's is pink. I was all for the idea at first, but now I've limited game time to 20 minutes each day. I set a timer. For real.

We started back to school yesterday, and it went really well. We've already finished this morning's session, and we'll do half of the afternoon session (math) before we leave for Laurie's, and half (language and phonics) when we get back. This whole 'time management' thing doesn't suck, I'm telling you. Why has no one ever mentioned it to me before??

I hope everyone is having a lovely week. I shall return soon!!

Out With The Old ...

Ok, I've got a few resolutions for my 2010. Ready?

1. I want to continue doing better with my house. The last few weeks have been awesome, I've been working (with lots of help from John) on some new systems that have made a huge difference. Let's see if I can keep that momentum going.

2. I want to do better with my household budget. Cause, y'know. Debt = awesome. Or not. Also, we plan to be 100% debt-free (except for the larger house note) by October, or the end of the year at the latest.

3. I want 75% of my food to originate 100 miles or less from my house. It's become A Thing with me, one I'll elaborate on more in the coming weeks.

4. I want to post on my blog 3 times each week, with pics twice a month.

5. I want to visit three states this year, layovers not included. :) I'm thinking Ohio, somewhere as of yet not determined, and call me crazy but I'd love to road-trip to Iowa and visit someone's farm. I have yet to inform that last person that I want to come visit her. I should probably check first.

6. I want to finish my book this year. Even if no one ever reads it, I just want to prove to myself that I can.

Do you have any resolutions? Let's talk about them!!

Notes unrelated to my resolutions: I'm almost 28 weeks pregnant!! Had an ultrasound a few weeks ago, and everything looks wonderful. Baby is measuring right within range, I've finally started to gain weight, and I feel very ... pregnant. The whole 'bending over' thing is getting somewhat difficult.

Christmas, at my mom's house this year, was awesome. Sarah got me my absolute fav gift, and John bought me the coolest set of butterfly-shaped flights for my much-needed new set of darts. They probably cost all of $3, and I'm completely in love with them.

I am the only well person in my house right now. Everyone else has the cold that's going around the church, the one from which I recovered three weeks ago. Way to stay ahead of the curve, family!!!

It's 25 minutes from the New Year, and I'm thinking I'll be asleep by then. John's at work, and hopefully he'll be home before 1. So ... Happy New Year!!

that Mom Of The Year award probably got lost in the mail, right?

My kids are all sitting at the table right now doing their schoolwork. David is destroying eating playing with play dough, and Evelyn and Samuel are doing math facts. Here's what I hear:

*cue humming* *cue VERY earnest singing*

Evie: Mama, just killed a man ... put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger now he's dead ... *singing trails off* Hey Sam, why do you think he killed the guy?

Sam: I dunno. Maybe the man made him wear those white pants.

*laughter*

E: Yeah, those were really bad pants.

*cue more singing*

David: I see a little silhouette of a mouse.

E: No, David, that's not how it goes ...

*and the conversation goes downhill from there*

That's right, my kids are discussing Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody. I have officially arrived as a parent.

Also, if you haven't seen that video in a while ... or ever ... your life is lacking some pure awesomeness. Go now and watch it. G'head!! Go!!!

Mexican Hot Chocolate

I unveiled this new (to me) drink at today's book club, and it was a huge hit. We met at my house, and since it's October and our book was originally written in Spanish, I decided to go with a Dia de los Muertos (day of the dead) theme. It's a Central American/Mexican tradition that, unlike Halloween, isn't all about the creepy and the gouls and the ghosts. It's about celebrating the lives of your loved ones who have passed away.

There are several traditional foods that are served on Dia del los Muertos, and I'll be posting the ones I made in the next few days. The first one I'm posting is because of popular demand. Seriously, everyone who was here today wanted the recipe, so ... Sonia, Melanie, Elli, Lisa, and Esther, this is for y'all!!

Mexican Hot Chocolate

2 c boiling water
1 chile pepper, stem and seeds removed (or 1 t cayenne pepper)
4 c milk
1 c cream*
1 vanilla bean, split**
1-2 cinnamon sticks, halved
8 oz bittersweet chocolate***
2 T sugar
whipped cream****

In a small saucepan, add chile or pepper to water and reduce to a quick simmer. Reduce to 1 cup of liquid and strain and discard the solids, reserving the liquid.

Over low heat in a larger saucepan, combine the milk and cream, vanilla bean, and cinnamon sticks, stirring frequently for 20 minutes. DO NOT BOIL!! Add the chocolate and cinnamon, stirring with a whisk until the chocolate has completely melted. Remove the cinnamon and vanilla and turn off the heat. Add the chile-infused water little by little, according to taste.

Serve immediately (this drink separates and settles very quickly) with whipped cream on top. Enjoy!

*I use 5 cups of 2% milk. I mean, seriously, it's already a pretty rich drink without the cream.
**If you cheat like me and use a high-quality liquid vanilla (mine comes in a wine bottle-sized bottle from Mexico), don't add it until you stir in the chile water. Vanilla becomes bitter if you leave it in the heat for too long.
***I found a dark chocolate that was in between semi-sweet and bitter sweet. I think it had 64% cocoa? Anyway, it tasted great, and I didn't have to add any of the sugar. And let's talk chocolate for a minute. If you buy a cheapo chocolate, your drink will taste like it has a cheapo chocolate in it. For a recipe like this, splurge, and buy the good stuff. You'll thank me, I promise.
****Don't make me come over there and slap you because you decided to use nasty-ass faux horrid whipped cream from a can, or even worse, Cool Whip. I will come after you and show you the error of your ways. You don't want that. Make the real stuff.

:)

conversations with John

Random conversation that took place yesterday morning when I got off the phone with a friend of mine ...

Brea: Hey, when my fabulous and beautiful friend Liz gets a high-paying job in New York, can I go visit her and her husband Alex if she buys me a plane ticket? In like a year?

John: Hey, how come I'm never invited on these imaginary and/or hypothetical trips? Maybe I'd like to get a break from the kids and everything, too. Did you ever think of that?

B: No, actually. I didn't. You've never said one kind thing about New York, and you always make that scoffing noise when I bring up most places I'd one day like to visit.

J: Well, I'd at least like to be considered in your plans.

B: I do consider you when making imaginary plans. Someone has to stay with the kids.

J: You just thought to yourself that you consider me the babysitter, didn't you?

B: NO! I did not use the word babysitter in my head.

J: You're lying. But I don't care. And since when is Liz considering a job in New York?

B: Well, I don't think she actually is. It's been a bunch of talk so far. Then she calls me, and we make imaginary plans. Hey! Did I mention that she and another friend and I are going to Italy to celebrate our 35th birthdays? In like 2017?

J: Again I'm not invited?

B: On the Italy trip? Definitely not. It's a girls weekend.

J: How long of a girls weekend?

B: Um ... a two-week long one?

J: And I'm staying with the kids?

B: Uh huh. But tell you what. If Liz gets a high-paying job in New York and decide to spring for plane tickets for you and me, and I can get our moms to watch the kids, would you want to come with me to visit Liz and Alex?

J: I don't know. I don't think I could just let someone else buy me a plane ticket.

B: OMG(osh) THIS IS WHY I NEVER INVITE YOU ANYWHERE YOU INSANE REDNECK IN SHORTS AND WORK BOOTS AND TALL SOCKS AND A BAD HAT!!!!!! YOU MAKE ME COMPLETELY CRAZY, YOU KNOW THAT?!?!?!?????

B: It's cool, it's imaginary plans anyway. But your ass still isn't coming to Italy in 8 years, so deal with that now.

Monday Meal Plan

(Yeah, I know it's Tuesday. So sue me.)

Tuesday: John is off. Yay! Leftovers for lunch, and stir-fry for supper.

Wednesday: John opens. Chicken sandwiches for lunch, pot roast for supper.

Thursday: John is off. Roast beef sandwiches for lunch, spaghetti for supper.

Friday: John closes, and we'll be doing massive getting-ready for book club on Saturday. Pizza for lunch, leftovers for supper, plus fun stuff from the market.

Saturday: John closes. Dia de los Muertos meal for lunch book club, and enchiladas with rice for supper.

Sunday: John closes. Leftovers for lunch, and sandwiches for supper.

Kind of boring week until Saturday. I'm ok with that. :) What are you eating this week? Got a good recipe to share with me? I'm always on the look out for new things!

my sad story

about my mouth. Remember I thought I was working on a sinus infection? Notsomuch. I had a tooth that had gone over to the Dark Side, and very long story short, I had one of my wisdom teeth pulled on Wednesday. Starting Sunday evening, I was pretty much curled up on the couch/in bed with pain. It sucked.

By the way ... having a tooth pulled? While you're pregnant and don't have access to the really fun pain meds?

Not cool.

At least they revised the whole you can only take Tylenol when we're done decision.

Probably because I looked like I was going to stab someone if they stuck with that for too long.

So that's where I've been. I've got some food musings coming tomorrow, and John is starting a three day weekend (over a real weekend. What the hell?) tomorrow. Hopefully, we'll get out to Cameron and buy some new chicks. We'll see.

And my garden started coming up today. Lots of teeny-tiny little fuzzy green things. Woohoo!

The Simple Woman's Daybook

Outside my window... it's foggy and muggy, and I still can't get over how GREEN everything is right now.

I am thinking... that I have limited garden space, and how I can best use it.

I am thankful for... an amazing husband who comes home from working an 11-hour-day and immediately sends me to bed because of my tooth, and takes care of everything for the rest of the evening. Seriously, that man is awesome.

I am wearing... my favorite Petrol jeans and a dirty t-shirt (I've been tilling, and I'm taking a break before I head back out with the kids to start planting).

I am remembering... life before children as I watch them finish their school for the day. (It wasn't that great, for the record!)

I am going... to finish my winter garden before lunch, and run up to the Book Basket this afternoon to order World War Z. And maybe get a (decaf, of course) Pumpkin Spice Latte.

I am reading... Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver. Again. You need to read this, people!

I am hoping... to not be a whining baby for the rest of the week, because the dentist can't see me until Monday, and I can't really take any medicine other than the occasional Tylenol.

I am creating... a person. In my belly.

On my mind... I wish I lived closer to Sarah (or she lived closer to me), I am blessed with awesome friends and family, and God is so very, very good to me.

From the learning rooms... today, it's gardening! What is a winter vegetable here in Texas? Why do we try to grow lots of our own food? Why do we plant more than we can eat? (Because it's not worth having things if you can't share them!)

Noticing that... the more simple I make my life, the happier I tend to be.

Pondering these words..."Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it." Faith isn't always easy as an adult. Sometimes, I do wish I could be more like my kids.

From the kitchen... leftover potato soup from yesterday, making bread this afternoon, and smoothies for our morning snack.

Around the house... finishing the laundry, unpacking the bags from last week (I haven't had the energy to get to them yet!), and trying to make some sense of the upstairs.

One of my favorite things... feeling content. Right now, I'm there. :)

Potato Soup

Potato Soup
by Brea Stewart

This very basic potato soup is a favorite around our house, because you can dress it up in so many ways, and it's CHEAP!! It's simple to make, and if you're just making it for 2, then halve the recipe and enjoy leftovers for lunch the next day.

1 large baked Russet potato
2 large raw Russet potatoes, peeled and cubed
1 small white or yellow onion, cubed
1 quart chicken stock
1 cup cream (or half and half, or whole milk)
1 T fresh thyme (or 3/4 t dried thyme)
salt and pepper to taste
garnish*

In a food processor or blender, pulse raw potato chunks until finely minced. Repeat with the onion. Add both to the chicken broth, with 1t each salt and pepper and the thyme, in a large stockpot. Cook just below a simmer for 1 1/2-2 hours, stirring frequently. Slowly stir in cream, and add chunks of baked potato (leave the skin on for a more rustic taste). Test the taste and add salt or pepper as needed. Cook for 10 more minutes, ladle into deep bowls, and garnish as desired and serve immediately.

*cheddar cheese, fresh bacon bits, sour cream, chives, diced broccoli, diced peppers, shredded chicken, or anything else that sounds good!

**For an interesting twist, puree 1 cup roasted red peppers with 3 T roasted garlic and add about halfway through the cooking process. Mmmmmm ...

***Amazing and hearty on a cold day. Goes great with a side of salad and/or some toasted french bread.

some random ramblings

I just finished my book club book for this month, Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon. It was amazing; I loved it and thought it was a perfect October book. Written in 2002 (maybe?) and translated into English in the last few years, it's set in Barcelona in the 1950's. A ten-year-old named Daniel discovers a book by the author Julian Carax. When he sets out to find other works by the author, he discovers that someone is destroying every copy of Julian Carax's work to be found. Daniel decides to learn more about the author's life, and the story he learns is very sad and at times very dangerous. Seriously, you can get it on amazon for under $3.00. What have you got to lose?

The kids and I just spent almost a week in Katy with my family. It was a ton of fun, and I got to take the kids to the Rice Harvest Festival. I haven't been in at least ten years, and I loved going back! Ran into several people I know, and got to hang out with some old friends afterward at my mom's house. I'll be posting pics on Facebook later today.

I think I have a sinus infection. I've spent about 1/4 of my time the last new days praying for death.

John and I have become completely and irrevocably obsessed with Dexter. It's amazing. And fortunately, blood doesn't bother me, so I can tell John what happened after a particularly gruesome scene.

I'm making my awesome potato soup today. It's wonderful. Even the crazy people I know who are flirting with the idea of being vegetarians like Sarah, can make this. You just can't add bacon. I'll post the recipe later when I dig it out of whatever hole in which it's chosen to hide.

I believe life is not worth living without bacon.

Just ordered a new recipe card organizer to try and start wrangling the chaos that is My Kitchen. I can't wait for it to get here!!

I had to have the radiator replaced on my POS truck while we were in Katy. Long story. At one point, I ran out of bad words and had to start making up new ones. Not kidding. So I now have $482 fewer dollars ... but a truck that runs. Tell me again why I like the damn thing so much?

We got to hear the baby's heartbeat last week. It was awesome. I've gained 4 pounds in 16 weeks, and all looks well so far. Woohoo!!

:)

it's a very sad birthday

But a happy one, too. My sweet little brother, the youngest one, the baby of the family, turns eighteen today.

And also, he's not little anymore. He's, like, 8' 13" or something. (Not really, but he's crazy tall.) He's towered over all 5' 2" of me for years. He drives a car now. Sometimes, he talks about girls (EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW!!). Is a senior in high school. Went to Europe last summer. Tells me about books he's read.

None of these things are supposed to happen, because he's my little baby brother. So, to sum it up, I'm not ok with him turning eighteen today. He's a freakin' grown-up.

How is he celebrating? He and a bunch of friends are skipping school ... and going to MFAH, the Museum of Fine Arts in Houston. Which is, admittedly, a pretty cool thing to do. I kinda used to do it all the time when I was in school ... but that's a whole 'nother post.

Back to my brother. I love him to death. We're really, really close. Last night on the way home from book club, he made me laugh so hard that I couldn't breathe and had tears streaming down my face.

So happy birthday to my ginormous little brother. And no, this does NOT mean that I'm acknowledging that he could take me down. I will continue to tell him on a regular basis to watch his back, lest I decided to come and kick his ass just to take him down a notch or seven.

Cause that's what good big sisters do, right?

Chuck Norris can divide by zero

I'll be playing with the layout over the next few weeks, so don't be surprised if it's different every time you visit. :)

In other news ... We didn't get the belt changed today because of some technical difficulties, but I did get three of the hoses replaced on my own. After making a trip to the parts store to replace something that broke. So, step one to taking over the world: learning how to replace engine hoses. CHECK!!!!

Edited to add: Any final new layout will be approved by SaRaH, the one with me in the picture up top. Because she is high maintenance. And also, she is the boss of me.

My Truck, or The Story of a Total POS

I have a truck. After going for almost two years with only one vehicle, we bought my truck. Found it on Craigslist, didn't pay much for it. John says we overpaid, and I say that you can't put a price on (my) happiness.

It's a complete piece of crap.

And I love it with an unfounded, makes-no-sense kind of passion.

John hates it, in a fire-of-a-thousand-suns kind of way.

She's a '94 F150, (mostly) white, two-door with a full backseat. Which means we all fit with legroom and no jump seats. Yay!! Used to belong to the City of Austin, and she was one of their paint crew trucks. She has paint ALL OVER HER. John says it makes her look really ugly. I say it gives her character. 4.9, V6 engine, so I can pull stuff if I want to, but she doesn't eat gas like a V8 would. Both kayaks fit in the back at the same time. Her name is Shirley Mae. Because she's a good 'ole country truck.

Except ...

She keeps breaking. And so, John hates her.

Here's the thing. I was talking with John one day, and he laughingly told me that I'm missing a pink gene from somewhere in my DNA. And I've decided that it's true. Don't get me wrong, I love to cook, and being a mom and wife totally rocks. However, I like a lot of decidedly un-pink things. I love guns. I like having dirt under my nails after working outside. Clearing underbrush by hand is not only enjoyable, it burns lots of calories.

My dream is to one day buy an old, non-working '69 Stingray and rebuild the whole thing. And in this dream, fantasy harshly collides with reality. I know absolutely NOTHING about cars. Or trucks. Or engines. Whatever.

My new goal in life is to learn lots of mechanical stuff. My first step? Tomorrow, I'm going to be replacing the main belt in my truck, along with several hoses. I'll have some help, but I want to be the one who really does it.

Wish me luck, and I'll let you know how much skin I lose off my knuckles in the process.

Might even post a pic or two. We'll see.

Adventures in Parenting

This happened while I was pecking out my last post, and if I don't put it down now, I'm going to forget it. :)

Drama Mama comes running into the house, crying buckets of tears.

"Evie, what's wrong, hon?"

"David said he was going to catch a cottonmouth and throw it at my head!!!!!"

"Wait, wait. Is there a cottonmouth outside right now?"

(**we did have on by the deck last week, and we killed it, but David is kind of obsessed**)

"No, but he says he's going to find one and pick it up and throw it at my head!!!!!!!"

(Seriously, that was how she was speaking to me. Italics and bold and all.)

"Ok, Evie. Let's talk for a minute. I have some news for you. If David tries to pick up a snake and throw it at your head, it's going to bite him. And it's going to hurt him really bad. And he's going to drop it, so don't worry. He won't be able to throw a snake at your head or any other part of your body."

"Oh. Ok."

"And Evie, what's the snake rule?"

"NEVER PICK UP A SNAKE!!!!!!"

"Exactly. Remind your Danger Boy brother for me, will you?"

"Sure, Mom!"

It's conversations like this that make me feel very secure in the fact that my Parent of the Year award is on its way to my house right now.

**There are four basic types of venomous snakes in Texas: CCCR, the coral snake, the copperhead, the cottonmouth, and the rattlesnake. As of last week with the death of a cottonmouth we temporarily named Tom, all four have been killed within a hundred feet of my house. And .... um ... this isn't news for my FB friends, but we kind of have an escaped coral snake somewhere in the house. We've named him George.

All that to say, my kids are very, very, VERY good about snake safety. I am fairly certain that David wouldn't go find a cottonmouth and pick it up and throw it at Evie's head.

But I think I'll go have a chat with him, just to make sure ...

Adventures In Parenting

So I'm trying to get some rest during the kids' nap time this afternoon.

(Translation: I'm praying that they keep it down long enough for me to get three winks so I don't pass out from exhaustion later.)

I hear a tapping on one of the downstairs windows. I investigate. Nothing there. My dog is asleep, and all the doors are still locked, so I know it wasn't one of my creatures. Neighbor's dog, maybe? Really stupid humming bird? It's happened before, just not repeatedly like that. I go back to bed.

More tapping.

Upon investigation, more nothing. Starting to get a little frustrated here, so I decide to camp out in the chair beside the window and see if my poltergeist feels the urge to take a visible form.

A few minutes later, I look up from my book and see something. Hmm, a piece of paper with about ten paperclips just fell to the ground. What the hell?

Then I find my answer. A rope with a magnet tied on the end is lowered, and it picks up the paper with paperclips. Before the rope completely clears the window, a small car falls to the ground. The rope reappears a few minutes later, paper-free, and tries to get the car. No success.

At this point, the Good Parent Gene kicks in, and I decide to stop my child or children from leaning out the window, which (because of a very tall foundation on that side of the house) is about two and a half stories up.

I high-tail it up the stairs and into the boys' room. To my not-in-the-least-bit surprise, Drama Mama Evelyn is directing this shindig, Eldest Sam is the one with hands on the rope, and Danger Boy David is the one chucking stuff out the window. I whistle (after making sure David had pulled his entire body back inside) and all three whirl around. I give them The Stare.

They give me the who me? I wasn't doing anything remiss look. They are such punks. And they totally know it.

The results: I took away the rope. And the car. And the paperclips. And the chair below the window. And promised to beat them all with a big stick and make them sleep outside for a week in the rain if they ever do that again.

And I'm guessing it will be less than 24 hours before my mom figures out that a) I'm posting again, and b) calls to tell me that the babies shouldn't be hanging out the window. On this point, of course, she will be completely right.

one way to make sure your day starts off well ...

After your husband makes a totally valid point, and does so in a very loving way, get defensive.

When you turn to stomp off, he'll ask, "Are we going to have breakfast together?"

Lie and say, "I was planning on it, but then you started being an asshole, and I'm not hungry anyway."

This works out especially well if you a) are freaking starving, b) have yet to finish your first cupof coffee, and c) are completely wrong and refuse to admit it, even to yourself.

The End

**This post is brought to you by the letter L, the number 14, and a myriad of CRAZY HORMONES.

**I have apologized, and John and I are friends once again. Just in case you were wondering.