Tuesday, March 6

thoughts about husbands and attitude ...

Man! I cannot dscribe the relief I am feeling today!!! Sam slept through the night for the first time last night since his surgery. I was beginning to think I had another newborn in the house. John came home last night with a raging headache, and stayed on the couch from the minute he changed clothes, until I woke him up at 11 to go to bed. My poor baby! He's much better today, after getting 12 (much needed!) hours of sleep. He left for work around 10, and should be back tonight around 11, because his Dale Carnige class is this evening, in Austin.

Working around John's schedule can really be a challenge sometimes. On the days he opens, he leaves at 7:10 and usually gets home between 6 and 7:30, depending on the kind of day he had. On the days he closes, he leaves here around 3:40, and gets home between midnight and 2, depending on what day of the week it is. Then we try to let him sleep in the next morning, until 9 or so. I know he feels bad on the days that he gets home so late from an open shift, because we always wait for him to get home before we eat supper (we rarely sit down to eat before 7 around here). I don't mind, though. I'm always so happy to see him when he gets home, no matter what time it is!

He also doesn't ever know when it's going to be an early evening or a late evening. There have been times when he's called to let me know he's getting out early (at 5:30!), and I don't hear from him again until 7:30, when he's in the car and calling me on his cell. Things come up ... 'it is what it is' is a favorite phrase around here. A friend of mine asked me a while ago why I don't get upset, because it makes it so hard to plan anything, even something as simple as supper. Here's my answer to that: My reaction isn't going to make any difference as to the time John gets home!! Which is going to bless him more? A) getting home late after a long, hard, stressful day at work and being greeted at the door with a smile, a hug, and a kiss, or B) getting home late after a long, hard, stressful day at work and being greeted at the door with angry glances, a sullen attitude, and guilt being placed on him? Which example is going to set a better example for my children as to how marriage should work? If we had a guest staying with us (my mom, a friend, the pastor's wife, God, or a neighbor) who was there to to watch my reaction, would that change the way I react?

Or how about this question: Let's pretend that John was able to avoid doing some of the things at the end of his shift, give some of his responsibilities to someone else, and rush home. Would I want him to do that? Do I want my husband, the man I am Biblically commanded to respect, reverence, and obey, to be afraid of my attitude, to be afraid of what is waiting behind the door for him when he gets home? May God strike me down first!!

Blessing our husbands can happen in so many different ways. I have a friend whose husband wouldn't notice if she didn't mop her floors for 6 months, but likes the bed to be made every morning. I have another friend whose husband doesn't notice what is for supper every night, but who really likes to have a big breakfast on Saturday mornings. Another husband doesn't care what the house looks like, but hates too much loud noise when he comes home from work because of his very hectic job. John couldn't care less about noise, but loves to come home to an orderly house. And he likes good quality coffee. So each morning, I get up before him to make a great cup of coffee that he can take to work. Each afternoon around 4, I try to start straightening up the living room, the dining room, and the kitchen; take the clothes off the clothesline and put them away; and sweep the floors. Around 5:30, I light a few candles or put something yummy-smelling on the back of the stove to simmer so things will smell nice when John walks in the door. Now, this is a best-case senario situation. I have crazy days where the house falls down around my ears and it looks like a bomb went off by the time John gets home. But I now it's important to him, so it has become important to me.

What are 2 things you can do this week to bless your husband, things you don't normally do that would delight him?

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